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Hide Yo Kids, Hide Yo Wife!

Well, if you haven’t heard Jermaine Cole is a married man. J. Cole was recently interviewed by Director Ryan Coogler when Coogler asked Cole how marriage has changed him. Unbeknownst to Coogler the emcee had not made his nuptials public knowledge. I actually heard the news on the radio this morning and now the blogs are blowing up about Cole’s secret wedding. J. Cole isn’t the first new school rapper to keep his relationship milestones under wraps. Last year Kendrick Lamar confirmed that he was in fact engaged to his longtime girlfriend in an interview with the Breakfast Club. Logic also confirmed he was married for two years now on the same radio show.

Why do Rappers keep that part of their life secret? Forget being in the public eye because Rappers have been married for years and have just never publicized that part of their lives. LL Cool J was dating his now wife at the time he released the hit Doin It. Snoop has also been married for decades but why can’t they celebrate that in their rhymes instead of hiding such a special moment in their lives? Image? A rapper is supposed to be a hardcore cold gangsta right? Or is Drake the only one allowed to incorporate being a spouse into their work life? These days most Rappers are not actively participating in the drug trafficking or anything else they claim to do so are we to assume that they all have wives at home while they are out here portraying a character or some sort of persona?

I just want to know why rappers can’t celebrate their marriages the same way you and I would. A lot of these Rappers are good father also. I don’t want a Kardashian wedding I want Rappers to be able to share their good news with fans and the like but for some reason it’s not good for their image. What image are J. Cole and Logic trying to pull off exactly? I’m sure it was the choice of these young men to keep their strides out of the media simply because of the things that the media does to instigate celebrity worship within western culture. However, I am also sure that some executive(s) from the label(s) or some “outsider” facilitated this pattern of behavior. Downplay monogamy and play up promiscuity in our community. J. Cole and Kendrick may not rap about having sex with multiple women but having young men and women think that you are living the bachelor lifestyle insinuates that you are in fact being promiscuous. Long ago if you were unwed by the age of thirty you had a problem but today it’s cool to hide your wife and your kids because if you weren’t desired in some way by fans you probably wouldn’t be desired in any way by a label.