Marriage is a responsibility that some people take on before they’re mature enough to handle it. Most rappers come into the game young and grow up into the man you see while others don’t age mentally and continue on living their lives as if they’re still under twenty five. Recently, Rapper Juelz Santana proposed to his longtime girlfriend Kimbella Vanderhee and she happily accepted the proposal on stage at The Apollo in Harlem as his Dipset family looked on. In sadder news, the mother of Sean “Diddy” Combs’ children passed away unexpectedly. Ms. Kim Porter had a longstanding relationship with the Hip hop mogul spanning decades despite his other public relationships. The wives, fiancés, girlfriends, and the mothers of the children of many a rapper have been the backbone of some of the greatest and some of the most cowardice men you’ll never meet. Lest we forget that these men are just that, men. With the same poor attitudes, lack of insight, and trouble as some of the men you yourself have encountered. I know there are men reading this and no this is not a “male bashing” piece but you know when your homie is tripping and you need to hold him accountable.
A lot of great Rappers are great because of the women they keep in their lives. Ice Cube has been married to his wife for twenty six years. Snoop Dogg and his wife have endured a lot in their twenty one years of marriage and it was all brought on by “rap game.” Not to say that Ice Cube and his wife Kimberly haven’t had any problems but we’ve never seen it play out in the mainstream media. Ice T married Coco Marrow in 2002 and although we may not have seen it coming it works for them. We cannot judge these women by whom they choose to spend the rest of their lives with. These women know what they signed up for and they are willing to make sacrifices that you probably couldn’t imagine. Jay Z and Beyoncé had a long courtship before they even acknowledged being in any relationship with each other. Ask yourself why Kendrick Lamar and J. Cole got married without any publicity.
The problem is that we as a society and a culture champion unhealthy relationships as oppose to healthy relationships. Just because you’ve married a certain type of person doesn’t mean that you have to disguise lowering your standards as compromise. It doesn’t matter how much time you put into a relationship if you’re young get out, if you’re being abused get out, and if you’re not happy get out. Time waits for no one and while you’re out here trying to see the potential in a man who does not care about you. You may feel like you have to stay because of this person’s mental health but what about your mental health? Women sacrifice a lot for men who have no intentions on respecting you, loving you, and treating you the way you deserve to be treated. Being tit for tat is not healthy and cheating because he cheated is redundant because you can always leave. Some women want to be married so bad that they are willing to throw away everything they’ve worked for on a title and some status. It’s one thing to be married but the rap game is not listed on that marriage license.
“You shouldn’t question if you ever stood a chance with him.” – Pusha T (40 Acres)